Respectful & Necessary: India’s Daughter

I am posting this on March 9, 2015. A regular Monday. Rape is not just an International Women’s Day issue. It is an everyday-of-the-year issue.

Death and Birth of Nirbhaya

On the night of December 16 2012 a 23-year-old woman, a medical student, was gang raped by 6 men in a moving bus in Delhi. She had boarded the bus with her male friend after watching a movie. There was no one else in the bus but them and a group of intoxicated men who were out for a “party”. An altercation between the woman’s male companion and the group led to his beating and her brutal rape. All the while the bus kept circling a strip of highway. The rapists then dumped her and her friend, naked, by the side of the road into the cold Delhi winter night. She died a few days later in the hospital of her wounds. The doctors were surprised that she had lasted as long as she had, given the extent of internal organ damage that she had suffered.

On December 17 2012 when the news started circulating about the horrifying rape and its shocking details young Delhi-ites took to the streets demanding justice for ‘Nirbhaya’, as the young woman was metaphorically named to keep her identity safe. Nirbhaya means “without fear”. The demonstrators cried for justice for rape victims, for equal rights and equal freedom for Indian women everywhere.

(c) Ramesh Lalwani CC BY-SA 2.0

(c) Ramesh Lalwani CC BY-SA 2.0

The fire spread to other major cities of India. All this is very reminiscent of chapters from our history books on the Indian Independence Movement, and it rightly should because we, Indian women, are still fighting for our independence from the Patriarchal Raj.

The controversial India’s Daughter

When I first learnt that the incredibly insightful documentary series, BBC4’s Storyville, will be premiering a documentary film-“India’s Daughter“-on the Nirbhaya rape case on March 8, to coincide with International Women’s Day, I was nothing less than proud. I was proud of being a citizen of a country which was open to unbiased documenting of an incident that had cast such bad light on its gender values for the world to see; that was mature enough to revisit the trauma, not to rekindle pain, but to educate; was unafraid to expose its weakness in order to give voice to its weakest. Having been a long time viewer of Storyville documentaries and appreciative of its programming quality I knew that the film would be well done (to say the least). I marked the date on my calendar, sent out a tweet about it as a ‘to whomever it may concern’ (as I thought it should concern everybody), and went to bed.

Over the next couple of days I picked up on some odd goings-on. I caught snippets of Twitter chat on…the idiocy of giving airtime to rapists…disrespect to society…the commercial interests of foreign channel…ban of a documentary…

No, it could not be!

Quick searches on Google and Twitter led me to these outrageous headlines,

Read article by clicking here.
Read article by clicking here.
Read article by clicking here.
Read article by clicking here.

My pride in my nation was replaced by bewilderment which soon gave way to anger. It seems we are not a rational country, we are an emotional one. The ruling party of India, BJP (which recently cut expenditure on its initiative for rape crisis centre by 92.6%!) was extremely annoyed by BBC4’s documentary and banned it from being aired in India.  The reasons for the ban against the film as a whole are superficial, ironically mocking their own logic:

“…rationale that the ban was in the interests of justice and public order as the film “created a situation of tension and fear amongst women” and the convicts would use the media to further his case in the appeal that was subjudice…”

(as summarised by the Editors Guild of India in its public appeal for revoking the ban)

If a convict’s statement of his innocence is considered to be true just because it was on television and on no other merit then  our Judiciary clearly doesn’t know how to conduct its business. I think it’s insulting and shocking that that is how much faith the Executive and Legislative branches of our government have on its most precious democratic institution. #JudgesAreNot Stupid.

As the ban was announced the public became aware of the aspect of the film that had stirred up the controversy: giving a convicted rapist (who was driver of the bus), Mukesh Singh, a public platform to profess his views on rape. If you thought that was soul cringing then how about dedicating film footage to the defense lawyers, (so-called) educated Indian men from higher social and financial classes, whose arcane ideas of female decency and role in Indian society weren’t so far away in their essence from that of the rapist’s notions. Now that struck a sensitive nerve. While many applauded the dissolution of the thin veneer of modernisation that Indian society boasts at any given opportunity, thousands took to online forums to voice their anger against the presentation of the film. The director of the film, Leslee Udwin fled the country in fear of arrest and BBC4 decided to air the film early (in the UK) on March 4 stating that the issue had been handled responsibly and refusing to bow down to external pressure. A BBC effigy was burnt in a protest in Varanasi, a sacred city for Hindus as a warning to BBC.

The key lessons that make India’s Daughter necessary

I didn’t want to enter the debate without first seeing India’s Daughter in its entirety since placing judgement on anything seen or heard out of context is much too similar to high school drama for me and I swore to stay away from all that the day I graduated high school.

The film makes a compelling case for facing the evil spread of the cancer that is gender inequality“.

Although it is the rapist’s voice that has stirred so much controversy making it seem as though that is what the documentary is all about it in fact makes up only for a fraction of the film. Yes, I knew beforehand what he could say in his defense. We’ve been given excuses for rape for a long time and they have come to be used as scare tactics/advice/disguise for misogyny: girl was “under-dressed”; was out late; was “mixing with boys” and other such banalities. So when I considered his statements they did not shock me. I was certainly angry. On the contrary I am surprised by people’s shock at Mukesh Singh’s unrepentant stance. Even those who have seen the documentary and reluctantly appreciate it seem to not understand the impact of the film.

Rape is about power, a misplaced idea of power. Power is the real source of the evil here, as is the case in many other circumstances. (I wonder how many people realize this.) Singh’s statements make this abundantly clear. He still feels powerful because he believes he is right. He believes he is right because we live in a society that propagates the same ideas. Society however does not condone Singh’s and his friends’ chosen expression of power (rape), which surprises Singh because he thinks he was acting within the rights given to him by society. That is a crucial message that hits home and makes the documentary necessary: Indian society as we know it right NOW gives POWER to men and not to women.

Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

– Lord Acton

Also, I can’t imagine why a man who could indulge in such a heinous act would change his lifelong-held beliefs just because of incarceration. We like to think that if we caught sexual offenders, locked them up, sentence them to death our job is done.

So why should we hear a convicted unrepentant rapist?

Because the solution to making India a safer place for women is not by locking up rapists, it is EDUCATION ABOUT GENDER EQUALITY, and that is the primary lesson of India’s Daughter.

The other major lesson gleaned from hearing Singh speak his mind is that of a sobering reality that exists not only in Indian society but also worldwide, a message that is amplified by the point-counterpoint nature of the narrative. The realization came when I heard from his parents and also relatives of the other rapists: These rapists (or devils, demons, animals, scum as we usually refer to them) are PEOPLE. They are OUR people, born to ordinary folks and who were living ordinary lives. They weren’t born as sociopaths they were made into one. We use language to distance ourselves from horrifying acts and their actors. When we give dehumanizing labels to people we remove society’s culpability. We can then sit proudly in judgement of these “others”. I suppose here’s where many of the detractors of the documentary chime in: “Why does this animal need to be heard?” Because by calling him an animal and giving him a sub-human status we refuse to face the ugly aspects of our species-nobody is above or beyond evil. Scary? Yes, it is. Right now it is scary to be a woman. (What is scarier however is a moralizing government for a seemingly democratic country.)

The main question here is could we have learnt all this without Singh’s interview? Was his interview necessary? I think so. He is a concise representation of the mistakes we are making. Perhaps some of these lessons are out there in the obtuse reviews made my investigative committees and in court documents; social scientists’ theses; lost amongst the indecipherable shouting matches dubbed as TV talk shows; or even rant-y blog posts on the internet. How far and wide would these sources of information reach when compared to an hour-long hard-hitting documentary on cable TV? Let’s take into account here the populace that does not use the internet regularly for social commentary and relies on television for everything.

A lot can also be learnt from the delusional statements made by the defense lawyers (ML Sharma and AP Singh), that are anachronistic to the point of hilarity. Especially when paired with the liberal views of Nirbhaya’s parents (whom we would consider of being from a lower social class and “unqualified”), make for the disturbing realization that India’s gender equality problem is not class-based or educational degree-dependent. How many Indians believe that only poor, uneducated people rape; women are oppressed only in the lower classes of society? Prejudice doesn’t play favourites. We need to stop generalising about our societal problems.

It’s convenient to blame the British for everything

I am also happy to note that India’s Daughter does not generalise. People were certain that a documentary made by a foreigner would provide wrong and overly generalised inferences about the problems in India. The film makes so such claims. It does not spin the idea that ALL Indian men are misogynistic with rapist-like tendencies. Neither did I hear a foreigner’s view on the issue. The film has been produced for a TV show that has a dedicated following. I think if Udwin or the BBC wanted to make money off it then we’d have heard of them submitting India’s Daughter to film festivals. I find this argument highly ridiculous especially given how ubiquitous rape scenes are in Indian cinema. I learnt the word Balatkaar (“rape” in Hindi) synchronously as I learnt Pyaar (“love”).Where did I first hear the term “ Uski izzat loot lee” (“stole her honour“)? It was Indian cinema. There is even a wiki page dedicated to Indian movies ON Rape (which now includes India’s Daughter)! How many generalisations have we gleaned from these other movies and how much money has been made? How much of this went to the  supporting rape victims? Also, I don’t think Udwin, who has been a victim of sexual abuse, would make this film for commercial gain (Source: “India’s Daughter” – A Young Woman’s Open Letter to the Prime Minister).

Will giving Singh a public platform encourage those who think like him to rape?

I don’t think it will; but ONLY when put in context of the film. When watching the film I realised that it is Nirbhaya who is the champion here and it is her life that needs emulating. The heart wrenching accounts from her parents and tutor paint a picture in such bold, resilient and joyful colours that Singh in comparison is a dull, ugly blotch. His act and his ideology pale into nothingness in comparison. The film crew have not been “disrespectful” as touted by many before the film’s release. They haven’t killed her memory. They have immortalised her achievements and her person forever. Even though there is quite a bit of eulogising in the beginning of the film towards the end we see Nirbhaya simply as a daughter who was taken away, in the most horrific manner possible, from her parents. She is the average Indian woman that we can relate to.

However over the past week we have just been hearing about Singh’s statements. He has received more publicity than ever before. If we were to believe that “publicity of rapist can entice rape” then the ban and the media circus that ensued has done more to further this cause (dubious as it may be) than the movie could ever have. Ironically the ban intended to protect our society has silenced the one who needed to heard the most: Nirbhaya.

Why should you want to watch India’s Daughter?

  • Because only by facing your biggest fears can you fight them.
  • To talk about things that make us most uncomfortable because that is how we tackle ignorance.
  • Because you need to know that every woman in India country is disempowered right now.
  • To realise that the ban is a myopic stand taken by a government that has essentially shot itself in the foot. (For more on the incredulous reasons given by politicians for the ban please read the op-ed piece (“BJP Government, Don’t Embarrass India“) authored by writer, ex-diplomat and politician Shashi Tharoor.)

It must however be said that India’s Daughter is by no means the BEST documentary ever made. It is certainly good. It is also not a piece of comprehensive investigative journalism. I don’t know if it was ever meant to be one. There are some open questions, which are best outlined in the article: “The Selective Amnesia Of ‘India’s Daughter’ – What The Film Conveniently Ignores!” by Dr. Shivani Nag.

Let us remember

Your parents remember you, Nirbhaya, in the name they gave you. They call you Jyoti, “light”, that was born to remove darkness from their lives. I use your name now because your parents think that you, as a person, should be remembered in as much detail as your death, if not more. You have achieved more than what your parents dreamed. You have brought your searing light to our entire society, to burn through prejudice and patriarchal interpretation of Indian cultural values. You have made me nirbhaya to carry your jyoti for the freedom of all women. I don’t know what you looked like and I don’t need to. I see your face in every woman. Those who have missed the point of the documentary on your life and death have missed the point of all revolutions: to depose oppressive ideas by public activism.

(c) Ramesh Lalwani CC BY- SA 2.0
(c) Ramesh Lalwani CC BY- SA 2.0

42 thoughts on “Respectful & Necessary: India’s Daughter

Add yours

  1. This very well written, thought-out and researched essay/article iis an incredible achievement, Sam. Good for you…And I can see why you need a rest. It might be of interest to you that a new anthology on the subject of violence against women entitled VEILS, HALOS, AND SHACKLES found its publisher in India! That is very interesting in light of what I have read in your article and perhaps an indication that some things are changing..albeit slowly. I have a long narrative poem in the book entitled “Zauditu.” It’s editor hopes it will be out before December. We miss you! Judy

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s been years since you wrote this, but it’s never to late to say Thank You. I hope the anthology was well received. I am writing again, in fits, but I have started and am determined to keep going.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Great post and I must thank you for also being my insipration to ponder on the whole fiasco of the documentary. I spoke with several Indian feminists/other women of color writers and here’s my diverse take on documentary hype at
    I do however, feel that South Asian countries really need to do a lot in terms of rape, with WAR-Lahore we are still running the campaign for awareness raising against prevalent mind sets that its always the girls fault. It is so NOT, thanks again Sam!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thought provoking post Sam. Love your honesty and passion. As a woman, I felt disgusted when the story broke. I was looking forward to watch the documentary but unfortunately I found the details too upsetting to stomach and I actually stopped watching it.I had read a lot about it though. I am aware that sometimes such issue in India and many other countries can be brush way too quickly under the carpet. It was long overdue to be aired for the world to see and I am glad BBC did.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am glad BBC made it and aired it too. Thank you Jini for your thoughtful comments. Yes, we are hoping that this matter will not be brushed away. It’s about time that we saw some real tangible change.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I can’t put into words how I feel about this issue, Sam. I watched the film on TV two nights ago, having already watched it on someone’s blog. The crime itself appalled the world. That women suffer such heinous crimes is beyond belief. I know rape goes on worldwide but it’s attitudes to it I find so hard to stomach. That any man can believe it’s a young innocent girl’s own fault simply for being out of doors after 6.30p.m. beggars belief. And that the Indian Government should ban it is equally unbelievable. I’ve looked at all the comments above, many of them echoing my own feelings. My heart went out to those parents who were so proud of their intelligent, caring daughter. Their only child. The interview with the rapist left my truly horrified. Surely, things must change soon. Thank you, Sam, for this brilliant and thorough post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Millie for sharing your impassioned thoughts and kind words. We are together in this call for justice, not just for Nirbhaya but for all women around the world. I grew up in a more open society than the one my mother but the conservative fraction has been spooked up by the rapid progress. They are mishandling India’s trust. Ironically it has now led to more heated debates and activism. We will see change. I am positive about it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I truly hope so, Sam. I speak to a few young, Indian bloggers and I know how desperate you all are for change to come. This tragic story has simply brought the situation to the attention of the rest of the world. As you say, though, the problem is worldwide and progress is so very slow.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you for putting light on this, Sam. We have a yearly march here in Us called Take Back the Night. It does grow every year with almost as many men as women, so that’s a little hopeful. But rape continues. Fortunately, recently there is less forgiveness of sports players raping, and less blaming the victim, but still it continues. I agree that it is not about jail time, but educating about gender equality – although I would love to see the punishment be – cut off their balls, but that is just my anger talking.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes Mary. Rape is a universal problem. Thank you of much for your thoughtful comment. I wonder if you’ve heard about this upcoming documentary on the rape culture in US universities:
      As for seeing the rapists punished for their crime, here’s a news story (graphic content) that you’d be interested in:

      I don’t know how I feel about it – avenged, angered, scared? All I know is that it is not a sustainable way to go forward with this issue. I understand the sentiment completely, however.


    1. Thank you Mike for your supportive comment.
      Yes, it is indeed horrifying. There is gender inequality everywhere but India is one of the prime examples. From my earliest memories of understanding of it to now actually things have gotten better, if you can believe it. There have brutal crimes even after 2012 but this particular case was the first time there was an outcry of such magnitude.
      It is wholly disheartening to the cause of equality when even the freedom of speech is disallowed. The ban is just an awful thing.


      1. Thanks Sam, India is a beautiful country and it must be heartbreaking to have these undercurrents. Time & perseverance can reveal surprise results sometimes – ever hopeful!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. A most moving piece written in the clear, informative, and well researched manner which we have come to expect from you Sam. If India can produce such women as you, yet the societal norms be as you describe, something is indeed badly wrong. Did Indira Gandhi make no difference?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Derrick for your kind words. 🙂
      Something is very wrong in India. I have lived all my life knowing fear. My parents made sure I was indoors. They never took a chance. However they never discouraged me interacting with boys and that helped me realise that what I (and my parents) feared is not men but a mentality. People use religion to further their power, and that has been the way of the land forever.
      You’d think that Indira Gandhi would have changed people’s notions but you see our female politicians are themselves idolised. They are supposed to behave in a defined manner and they are called “Mother”, given god-like status. So people stop associating them with the ordinary woman on the street.
      As an aside, Indira Gandhi was one of the most despotic PMs we ever had. She loved to ban things!

      Liked by 2 people

  7. I am in Canada and just watched it on our national network, CBC Television.
    Unfortunately, I missed a lot of it because I am visually impaired and it was subtitles. I really wanted to watch it, even though I also dreaded it because it is such a painful thing to imagine.
    I have been listening to the arguments for why it would only give attention to the rapists, sorry to hear about the banning, and am aware I am lucky to be here and not prevented from watching.
    I intend on writing a blog post about it, but also to mention the cases recently in the news in the US and here in Canada, to show that the treatment of women is a systemic problem and exists everywhere.
    I don’t know what I did miss, being unable to read the words of the people interviewed on screen, but I do know that pain and grief and so many other emotions can be just as palpable when heard in the sound of the voices. These are universal things and I didn’t need to be able to understand the language to grasp what is at the heart of the matter.
    Take care. This was a really informative post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi there!
      Thank you so much for your valuable insight.
      I feel lucky too, that I was able to watch it and it really frustrates me that people back home can’t have easy access to it.
      A new documentary is coming out about the rape culture in US universities. Here’s the youtube link:
      It is a systemic problem because the underlying impulses are the same everywhere.
      I look forward to reading your post and I also hope you get access to a version of India’s Daughter that is more suited to your needs, although by your comment here I feel you have grasped its essence perfectly. Thank you so much. Bests, Sam.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Beautifully written. I really really liked what you wrote, and there is a lot to talk and discuss on this subject; but let me put it down to a single verdict.
    “The documentary should not be banned but should be watched by EVERYONE to comprehend the roots of patriarchal mindsets in our soil, and contemplate the filth of “a certain class of people”. Now, ask me to define the “class”; again I need a lot to talk about the “class” because there should be NO CLASS when we are talking about this.”
    There is so much and so much to say.
    And thanks for sharing the Shashi Tharoor article, dint come across that before.
    Another article maybe you will find interesting..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes Samjoth. I agree with your verdict completely. This is not a class issue. Thank you for your thoughtful comment.
      Also a great link. Thank you so much. One of the better written pieces on the subject for sure!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Piyush.
      We need to make our womenfolk feel safe to express themselves as they wish and to live freely. There are so many good men in our country who are misjudged because of ignorant ways of a few. Thank you for your support. It means a lot!

      Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you John for your reading and valuable support. I agree with you completely. We need to realise that change comes from critical observations and we need to put our efforts into Change rather than picking on the source of the critique.
      Best wishes, Sam.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. I still remember reading the story about the gag rape. God! I can’t believe it’s been two years now, it seems like only yesterday. The news broke my heart and then i read that she had passed away eventually 😦 . There is absolutely NO JUSTIFICATION whatsoever for the heinous act carried out on the poor girl. And I do agree with bbc, it’s about time someone airs it, and I am glad they did.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am glad as well. They’ve done a good job. It’s too bad that many Indians will never get a chance to see it 😦 Thank you for heartfelt comment Ameena. It is such an important issue.


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